I don't think it matters whether nut is front or back, and I don't think it's aluminum, more likely plated steel. Maybe go ahead and tighten more, if it breaks you should be able to get a better one at a muffler shop that won't break.
You could even have muffler shop weld a spring eye on your header to help keep it on
and maybe do this too as recommended in another recent thread.
Quote:
For a better seal and minimize the spluge use hi temp silicon. Slather the stub and the exhaust, slide on, let cure.