Modern Vespa

As the subject line suggests, this morning I went to put on my helmet and briefly glimpsed some movement in there. Big ass spider, just waiting to waltz on into my ear canal and chew on what little brains I got left. Killed it, put on my helmet and went on my way. But you'd better believe that an interior helmet inspection will become part of my suit-up routine from now on. Yeeeeesh.

The birth of a(nother) complex.

It's a good thing you saw it first.

Pull the padding out and look for eggs.

Too late, he already put it on and got those things growing in the wax!

In my newsfeed today

https://www.abc.net.au/news/2024-01-04/lethal-sydney-funnel-web-spider-hercules-sets-record-for-largest/103286268

With fangs that could pierce a human fingernail, the largest male specimen of the world's most venomous arachnid — discovered by chance

oh, hello friend



*proceeds to burn helmet and that half of the shop to the ground*

I was trying to put a finger on why this all felt familiar to me.

Oh well, I've sealed my fate then. I'll report back when they hatch, although that's a sound I'm not looking forward to.

SteelBytes - it may surprise you to know that this is not making me feel better about my morning.

I forgot about Chekhov's earworm. Is something gonna wrap around my fuggin cerebral cortex? Also? This makes me feel not at all better about things.

could have been a snake

well, if it was a snake it would've eaten the spider and I wouldn't have had to burn down half the shop. so there's that.

Ah, well, he's not an Aussie, he isn't a Trekkie, he's from........

I think we can all agree that helmet snakes would have been worse. This actually DOES make me feel a little better about my morning.

One of the rare upsides of living in a cold place...*checking the thermo, it reads -11F right now*...is that up here we have zero spiders that are dangerous to humans and only one dangerous snake.

Not that I have much need for my helmet during winter either

I was a medic in Vietnam during the war....and in the field I removed all kinds of crawling and sucking things from ear canals.
It was best practice not to tell them what I was looking at in there 🙃 .....
It wasn't due to things in the helmet - usually, but from sleeping on the ground.
I hated the insects in Vietnam....things the size of birds flew onto your face at night
..leeches dropped on you all day, even if you didn't cross a water feature!
O.S.

I was once lopping a tree, hanging from a rope about 10m off the ground, half way through a chainsaw cut when I saw a BIG Huntsman spider run up my arm, up my neck and into my helmet. I had to finish the cut whilst it ran all over my head.

Hey DiBiasio, have a watch of this, You will never put a helmet on again with out checking first.

I'm starting to see that this may not have been the place to bring my anxieties.

Slightly off topic but...

Q. Do you know the worst thing about being bitten by a poisonous snake?
A. You are probably Australian!

You guys really bug me. As our Finnish friend stated, up North we don't have all the crawling stuff you have down South. I guess I would rather have a year long riding season, even if it came with a few creepy crawlers.

Bob Copeland

Hey DiBiasio, there are more than 43,000 different species of spiders in the world, but only a small number of them are considered dangerous to humans hope this calms you're anxieties bud.

But less than 30 species, which is less than one-tenth of one percent of all spiders that live in and around Los Angeles , have been responsible for human deaths Ooops, Shouldn't have put that bit

You don't need a head doctor man, were all here for you 😉👍, supporting you all the way .

Don't worry Folks most of these spiders live in DiBiasio's helmet, were safe.

Those helmet snakes are looking better & better

Bob,

Although I grew up in the frozen tundra (Buffalo, NY), I've been in LA for so long that I forgot about the seasonal limitations. Forgot or blocked out?

Hey Bugsy, I may need a head doctor after all...

At least it wasn't a Sabre-Tooth Potty Worm.

Even an asshat like me can't get intestinal parasites in the brine. In the brown.

In the BRAIN.

Just remember, they are more afraid of you than you are of them. That's why they bite you and kill you whenever they possibly can.

I'm not down with spiders on me ever but that candiru fish in the Amazon that gets stuck in your urethra has got to be the worst. Pissing in the Amazon is off my bucket list.

But our Australian animals are so cute, they don't all want to kill you.

https://www.australiangeographic.com.au/blogs/creatura-blog/2014/09/western-pygmy-possum-burramyidae/

And we have the Quokka - the world's friendliest animal.

"Hey, who turned out the lights?!?"

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Forest_of_the_Dead

I may or may not be a Whovian. I'm not saying.

Ah but he woulld if he could.

We interrupt this thread to present an opposing view in accordance with section 262 of the nonexistent MV fairness doctrine.

Here in Belgium the largest spider we have is the "large house spider" (Latin name: Tegenaria Parietina)
They can be up to like 10cm in size, legs included.

As the name already suggests they like to live inside houses. They make a funnel like web, mostly behind a cupboard or so and remain in hiding at the end of the funnel waiting for a potential prey touching the web.

Occasionally you can meet one in the middle of the floor, or a wall or in the bathtub, probably on its way looking for a better hunting spot. The walls of the bathtub are too steep and slippery and once they fall in they cannot get out anymore.

My wife is very much afraid of them so if she spots one I have to solve the problem.
But these spiders are completely harmless. On the other hand it is not always easy to catch them because they can run real fast to the nearest hiding spot.

I don't disagree with this sentiment but it's circumstantial. Any creepy crawlies that feel the need to occupy a space within my actual clothing have to die. Swiftly.

It's been a rather nasty year for spiders at my work. I'm the tallest so most of the webs end up in my face first. Tons of spiders dropping down from the rafters. Mostly small ones but once in awhile a big one will be suspended halfway to the floor. I put my helmet in a closed cloth bag sitting on my toolbox. Haven't found any spiders in there yet.

Yeah. Welcome to my world. I'm a bit surprised that my friends haven't invited me to be the first to enter little-used structures.

quote="Bob Copeland"]
You guys really bug me.
[/quote]
I see what you did there...