Modern Vespa

Baileys, Jaegermeister and possibly something else, with jam and sugar round the rim of the shotglass. As classy as it sounds.

I think my personal nadir was when the waiter came round with the last plate of dinner and asked "Who's missing one?", to which I replied "Hitler!"

Thanks, WM.

hitler! pmsl! spot on retort

Yep, loving your work there, Alice.

Did you ask for a prawn goebbels?

Nazis are a stock topic of conversation and hilarity at my office.

I feel more at home there than anywhere else I've ever worked.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SO5WoLnOOlU

I really can't answer that question Maver.

Bill X

still my favorite nazi related sketch!

Evening all Donkei Skokers , it's a proud day in the house of marc tomorrow, the kids are in their plays. Poppy at playschool as a pudding and Alfie as a Shepherd in infant school.

If any of the Skoks are in central London on the 23rd, it is the annual Jack Bunney christmas party. Yes this exciting annual event is now open to you all. This wonderful experience normally has this itinerary :
7.00 Jamie, Rob and I meet in a pub,
7.30 we move to a different pub,
8.00 we go back to the first pub,
9.00 we go back to the second pub
10.00 someone suggest buying shots
10.30 I buy a dozen shots
11.00 someone finds a dodgy underground club.
12.00 we realise dodgy club is dodgier than we first thought.
1.00 we wander streets looking for new club,
2.00 go back to dodgy club,
3.00 eat kebabs
4.00 an illegal Datsun home
6.00 fall asleep in the kitchen with trousers round the ankles and a bag of chips for a pillow.

So we are between Brecht and Amsterdam and we stopped off at some services for a comfort break and a caffine fix but looking back we may have entered the Twillight Zone without knowing it.

The building looked really modern and had been fashioned in the shape of a kidney bean but was finished in stainless steel,aluminium and painted metal tubes supporting the huge windows which looked out on never ending flat Dutch fields.
It looked like a projection of how all motorway services will look in the year 2020.
The interior was fantastic as well with a shop, a coffee shop , clean toilets and a huge seating area between the two and it was finished in this ultra modern, brightly lit blue and textured white paint.
It almost felt like it was too clean and orderly to set foot in it because you'd spoil the pristine effect of it all just by walking in and wearing anything less than a space suit.

I'm thinking of Destiny Angel from the TV series UFO.

The staff however all seemed to be members from the Adams Family or convicts on day release or even members of the local farming community.
No disrespect to Farmers but boy did they look rough or dismantled.
They could have been all members of the same family for all I know but looking back they did all seem to have the same "far off" look in thier eye.
It was a strange contradiction being served a pretty good latte in lovely surroundings by someone who would looked more at home on a tractor.
The guy that served us had the most tatty baseball cap that I think he must have been born with it looked so old and ragged.
I'm sure after we drove off we look at at each other and said "Did that really happen ? "

On the return journey we chose not to stop at it's twin on the opposite side of the carriageway but we did walk into a cafe/bar/bistro thing whose cleaner must have gone a bit crazy with the fliud because it reeked like neat Parazone so we turned tail and into the closest McDonalds.
It was that bad.

Do I sound middle aged yet ?

I was freezing my proverbials off in South London again last night....

Coo, what was that all about? Looks great!

Inevitably, my ET4 wouldn't start this morning, because it was minus-two and I hadn't run it since Friday.

God I hate that bike sometimes.

And to think you tried to sell it to me.

I've just got myself a new wallet because my old gay one gave up over the weekend.

This one has a no, it doesn't have a Union Jack it is a Union Jack.

On the point of that when did we stop calling it a Union Jack and others started calling it a Union Flag ?

Answers please.

Bill X

Looks like Pepy was down at the Imperial War Museum - some sort of Royal Legion shindig?

It's all rot and the Jack is basically naval. Mind you, anyone who cares that much about it is normally a massive tede.

There's the thing about nationalism - confident countries don't care about it, neurotic ones, well, they worry about it constantly.

It would behave itself for you, Bill, because you have a garage (also you would dominate and terrorise it).

What I object to: wear the stars and stripes or a hammer & sickle and you look like a trendy dude, wear the Union Flack and you look like a racist thug. My officemates like to point at my patriotic Doc Martens and say 'got your BNP boots on again I see'.

The Millies, it will be televised Monday 21st ITV1.

See, already doing my bit for H4H Marc. 8)

Did yousign up any sponsors?

It's really snowing rather a lot. I'm starting to fear for my journey home (on the GP800, which I would mind dropping and scuffing a lot more than I would the ET).

So pretty though.

Yeah, I have a feeling that flinging myself down Dog Kennel Hill won't be the greatest experience in this weather... I might chicken out if it is both wet and freezing.

My Dad actually said oh you'll have to be careful wearing that when he saw my new half face which made my heart sink.
It made me feel like I had to justify it's purchase in some way.
I like the Union Jack because it's bold, striking and colourful not because of some nationalistic pride and you have to admit it does look good.

The Hornet now has a new battery and turns over alot quicker but hey it was 6 years old.

Just ridden home (Blackfriars -> East Dulwich via Peckham). It's cold, it's wet, it's snowing, but it's not yet slippery.

Came home early, as I think it's going to be really nasty when it freezes in a few hours.

David

*Grabs helmet and runs for the door*

Snowing and laying here in Kent. Brrrr nasty. Leave for home now all of you.

Bill X

Ugh, it was very slippery with hard snowy sleet in your face. Glad that's over.

Oh God, an hour until I can leave, oh God.

i left at 4 and had a rather nice ride home apart from getting cut off by a taxi driver who was in a tearing hurry to get to the next traffic light 50m up the road... where i went up the side of the queue and in front of him again.

i have figured out two things:

1. i need some rain-ex or rain-coat or whatever that water beading product is.

2. i need glasses. riding at night with my visor down is like being at a rave. it's quite pretty and all acid-flashbacky but i can't actually see feck-all.

Rain-X is ideal for glass but I'm not sure that it would work on a visor.

The stuff is so amazing you can drive past a truck on the highway in the pissing rain and you can see clearly.

The water just beads up on the glass and flys off the screen and the irony is the faster you go the better it works.

It works even better at night without the street lights on because it tends to starburst a bit.

It sells really well in the US but isn't known that well over here.

I swear by it.

Would anyone be interested in a UK MV Members meet sometime on 2010 ?

Nothing certain yet but it's a thought.

A ha! Lets have a party and rub our helmets with cat crap!

I feel confident no one has put those words together in English before.

edit - and it looks particularly odd now Harvey got rid of his post. dammit.

Rubbing Helmet.........

Good man Pete.



I have had an interesting day. I had both kids christmas plays today. Alfie was fine shepherd.
Poppy was a sheep out of the whole school she was the only sheep. 12 angels, 6 snowmen, 6 reindeer and 1 sheep. wtf!

Anyway, since we had freezing temperatures and snow today my central heating has packed up. My landlord seems to be unobtainable, which is annoying, so I have had my own people round to look at it. Hopefully sorted in the morning but for now I have some oil filled radiators around the house.

All this on top of a visit by the Health and Safety people at the shop yesterday.

Sorry Wonder - wasn't sure it was in the best of taste; Cat Crap? Now available in solid or spray on, just ask your local supplier.

Have you never read this thread before?

Didn't want to visit just to leave my crap scattered about.

Harvey I really wouldn't have worried because this is where the removed and dismantled people come to talk bollocks.

Who would draw offence by something so innocent as Cat Crap ?

It looks quite tempting.

I was about to make a joke about US exports and then thought that was in bad taste. I then realised you were Canadian and that whole thought process was wasted. I could make a joke about Canadian exports but I like Michael Bublé

Sorry, but M Bubble is the absolute end, as Terry Thomas would have it.

PS - Marc, congrats on your kids starring roles. I hope you took pics. I have happy memories of being the big bad wolf and terrorising the three little pigs in my school play.

Didn't Bob Mortimer call him Mickey Bubbles recently ?

I think I was a locust in our school play/ history of the Bible.

Bill X

Thanks Kate, I took pics and video of Alfie but due to recent events there are no longer pictures or video allowed at Poppys playschool. It really is a messed up world sometimes.

PS. I was the door mouse in Alice in wonderland and slept through the whole play. I have pictures to prove it.

PPS. Some times I frighten myself. After getting all arsey about the lousy roles my kids got in their plays, the lack of pictures and religious nonsense being spouted. I sat down tonight with the kids and wrote a Christmas play for them, complete with 4 acts and 4 songs, they are going to make a video for me some time this week. It is a quality script, it took nearly a full 20 minutes to write so you know its good.



Ohhhh and.

Bill please don't tell me you paid this much:

http://www.aspinaloflondon.com/eshop-catalogue/mens-collection/mens-leather-wallets/brit-id-wallet/4030-brit-id-wallet

No I didn't pay that much for it. Wouldn't it be funny if it was worth more than the amount of money that was in it.
I think I paid about £15 for it in Bluewater on the way back from Amsterdam when I was shopping for somebody else. Always the way.
My last oversized one split its seam over the weekend but I'm not that bothered because it was so big it looked like I was really pleased to see you - all the time, so I'm not going to miss it.

1st day back at work today and I'm not looking forward to it.

Be good all.

Bill X