Modern Vespa

I occasionally check this thread to see what the Lobsterbacks are up to. Sometimes it is pretty funny.

But not funny for you Bill. Hope your headache went away soon. Now remember Toreador Pants!

Yes I know but it's a bloody folding bike not a mountain bike or a hybrid.

I would look pretty awful with all the gear and a bike with no idea.

No I shall wear my minor wound with pride and refuse to wear a cycle helmet.

I was actually using the riverside to see if it was a viable route from my house to work when the group I work for build a new 14 million pound dealership which starts this June and should be finished by March 2011.

It will only be 4 miles from my house so I'm thinking about cycling to work for the months that are dry and sunny so that's August and September sorted.

All was going quite well until that minor unscheduled modification which right now looks as raw as a pickle.

Suck it up Bill.

I wonder why I'm not a big fan of full head protection ?

Sleep well all.

Keep it steady Bill - hope your noggin feels a bit better!

It's alright. It's a little tender but I've had far far worse.

It just made me laugh because yeah I winced a bit but it wasn't a hard blow it was just a knock but I'd cycled about another 6 miles home and whallop there it was - a nice drying river of haemobglobin pouring from my noggin.

Blood's like oil though, there always seems more than there actually was.

I saw many things on my ride though - a man having a major arguement on a mobile, a restaurant that I didn't know exsited, a couple snogging in a car, a nissan figaro , a beautiful sunset and the cutest jack russel.

A good end to the day.

Bill XX

I'm picturing a man on a folding bike with a full face helmet on and I'm reminded of a local "eccentric" who used to ride around our neighbourhood when I was a nipper. His wasn't a folding bike though (iirc it was some sort of racer) and he would generally pair his overstated head protection with an altogether more thoroughly ventilated bottom half. I think he had some issues.

Glasd you're not planning on going down that route Bill.

One story I'm sure was about the same fellow (although it could be apocryphal) was an incident when the guy stopped a policeman in a fairly ropey part of a large Scottish town to ask him where would be a safe place to chain his bike up. The policeman's sarcastic response was to point at a nearby lamppost and say "probably halfway up there," and upon happening past the same spot later in the day the cop is said to have found the cycle dangling overhead by the lock. As said above, I cannot guarantee the veracity of the story, but have recounted it as well as I can remember.

Try a 'Tilly Hat' when cycling, just a hat, but has a closed cell foam lining in the crown, mainly to ensure it floats, but takes the worst out of a bang on the head.
some nice colours and styles.
Fay

Thanks Fay. I'll keep you posted on my headwear of choice.

Odd how I've never worn a helmet for cycling and this little scuff hasn't made me think about using one.

The amount of times I would ride back to my house with my knees and hands bleeding from the many spills I had when I was a child were many so I guess I see possible injury as an acceptable risk.

The first bike accident I had involved pushing my Honda XL125 home 2 miles with my socks soaking up the blood from my skinned knees.

Oh happy days.

Bill XX

Your retro injury memories are interesting yet disturbing Bill.

I recall being hit by a car when I was 9. Oddly enough, the woman who helped me was very nice as I lay by the side of the road, but I wasn't worried about me, more her dog which was up close and personal.

I got a pair of new trainers out of it and didn't have to do games for a month. Result!

I've blocked out the rest of it, probably a good idea...

I WILL NOT WEAR A STUPID STUPID CYCLE HELMET..... EVER!

There was a lovely Victoria wood sketch where she was cycling left to right with a pointy idiot cycle helmet cutting the air in front of her, Celia Imray (?) was cycling right to left with the same idiot helmet sloping down her back. They passed each without acknowledging the other. stopped, both turned their helmets round and cycled off screen.

As a cyclist I break the law all the time, but at least I look apologetic if I nip down a one way street or ignore a red light. I just hate that arrogant 'I have a right to do what I like attitude' most of them have.

The Tilly hat is a great piece of headgear, and their attitude is wonderful. Our hats don't wear out, if one ever does, we will replace it!

"Tilley Hats are more than just 'a hat'. They offer protection from the sun, rain and snow while keeping valuables safe and secure. They are document keepers, conversation starters, family heirlooms and a dashing accessory for most activities. Some customers and admiring fans have acknowledged Tilley Hats as the best-made and most practical hats of their kind worldwide!

We're proud of our Hats. You'll see many unique and diverse people showcasing their Tilley's around the world. With a history that spans more than 28 years we think it is important to tell you a little more about our Hats. Feel free to sit back, grab a coffee, maybe some cookies and read on..."

http://tilleyuk.com/home.asp?countryCode=UK

Fay

DECAPITATION

thank god the twig didn't hit you in the throat bill or folk would be recommendoing you wear an armoured anti slash neck scarf

2 words bill....

kangol and bucket 8)

zero protection but uber cool 8)

I have decided to be less vocal when someone cuts me up. I called some guy in a Volvo a f**king idiot today. It didn't actually help that he was built like a brick shithouse and looked like one of the Eastend Mafia. Oh and that my escape route wasn't as clear as it could have been.

At the point where I decided that now would be a good time to bid a nasty situation goodbye, I rolled on the throttle. Unfortunately the GTS didn't move. This puzzled me somewhat until I looked over my shoulder and found said brick shithouse leaning out of window holding onto my rear rack.

I left him 'armless yelling the word c**t and other unmentionables. Next time I think I will smile politely and swear quietly into helmet. Lesson learnt

Mmm, not good. But funny because you survived.

Take off the rack and perhaps swear at speed?

There was a ten second interval in slowmo where this was in question... It's an hour later now and some vino so feeling back to normal. It is funny now. Yep. He was a nutter. He deliberately drove at me. It was all very clear. If you're nuts enough to do that to someone...

I trust you had no trouble prising the fingers of the dismembered limb apart once you got home. Sounds like a right scary encounter!

I always go for the extended glower topped off with an incredulous shake of the head once eye contact has been maintained long enough, all while muttering the appropriate expletives. It gives you a good chance to abort if they look like they might go radge on you.

Hopefully he will at least have a strained wrist.

Back to cycle helmets. Does Genie wear one? I like the idea of Fay's hat...

I'm with the J on this one - the incredulous shake of the head speaks volumes to everyone in the vicinity but has the great advantage of being non-committal should the person at whom it is directed decide to take issue.

that sounds a bit scary doug, but i'm glad to hear that a glass or two has restored your perspective

no, i don't wear a bicycle helmet. i should, and i have a nice one in the closet, but that's where it has remained for some time. i do, however, have a tilley hat. i wear it for gardening. it doesn't go beyond the boundaries of my home and garden because what the good folks at tilley don't tell you is that once they've been through the wash once or twice you look like jed clampett

Got back from my trip last night, in one piece, even though I went via roads like this.

Full(er) report to come, but I'd recommend the North to everyone.

Yeah I looked at a Tilly Hat and I would without doubt look like a total ponce so they are not for me.

It really didn't hurt that much so I'm suprised that it bled so much but hey ho, you live and learn

If it was a macho mountain bike sure maybe I would use a helmet but it's a folder I would look a bit of a dick.

Wonder I have many crash stories like the one where I destroyed a fibreglass pannier by swiping it against the bumper of a truck that cut me up on the Elephant and Castle or the one when I threw my CX500 up the road when my 18,000 mile Avon Road Runners broke traction on an oily corner in an industrial estate.
Or the time I actually got blown off it riding over Rochester Bridge when I tried to ride on the left of two lorries in a gale.
I was doing just fine until I got to the gap between the cab and the trailer in front and I just couldn't hold it up so I let it fall at the slowest speed I could.
Or there was the time I went for a gap to the left of a car and into a bus lane and the bus pulled away and closed the gap.
I have a nice crash bar shaped dent in the bone of my lower leg as a reminder not to do that again.

Oh Happy Days !!

Bill XX

Scooter + Helmet = hell yes

Bicycle + Helmet = yes

Brain + Skull = always together in one piece.

A bike helmet saved me twice. Once from a nasty concussion when I 'turtled' my road bike on a trail. A second time when I crashed into a fence trying to avoid killing a pedestrian, it saved my face (the visor prevented me from full facial impact with the result that I only bruised my upper lip instead of breaking teeth). I have seen too many tragedies, so that I feel odd with naked noggin if I am on something with two wheels.

Then again, I'm wearing spandex...so maybe I'm certifiable...

I'd like to invite all the respective Kok's and all those coming on the Greek Islands Rally to Lunch at a Central London Restaurant so we can celebrate good food and conversation and put names to faces.

How does May 23rd around 12.00 ish all grab you ?

I'll sort out a venue at a later date but it will probably be an Italian.

What a suprise.

Bill XXXX

I have a set of four of these , just in case of emergencies.

Rode a bicycle in Cambridge while doing my degree. At various times I was drunk, without lights etc.

The time I came off was whizzing by an Aussie backpacker who turned into me, placing backpack in front of me. Bike kept going, I did not. No helmet it would have been a badge of shame.

All the whinging about cyclists and peds in London is mostly bullshit - if you want to see some unhinged riding then get yourself down to Garrett Hostel Bridge across the River Cam and watch the students slalom between the tourists. It was a sort of sport to us!

a lovely day but some sad news... my upstairs neighbour and his girlfriend were hit while riding two-up on his ET2 earlier this afternoon. he's got a broken jaw, she's still in hospital being checked over, and the scooter is totaled neither of them has received life-threatening injuries, but still it took the shine off an otherwise gorgeous day.

Oh dear. Best wishes to both of them.

Terrible news Genie, do give them our best from Detroit. I'd fly right over to offer whatever comfort, but well, you know, volcanic ash and all that.

Seriously, my best to them.

Please give them our collective cuddle.

Maybe you should do the next BBQ with, say, some French fish soup as an option for the jaw-challenged?

Oh crap, nasty accident time. Obviously they are not okay, but no permanent damage received?

Well what a fun filled weekend.

Went out for a catch up with my buddy Nik on Friday for some food and then on to the movies to see Kick- Ass which is easily the best movie I've seen this year. 10 out of 10 for everything.
There was only one problem and that was the trailer for Iron Man 2.
I sat there with my jaw open for 2 minutes and now I can't wait for it to come to my local flea pit.. It looks stunning.

Saturday I rode the Hornet up to Hackney then a two up ride into town to Infinity to buy a new pair of boots and some Summer gloves for Greece.
On the way back Genie and I witnessed the biggest wanker riding a Vespa but I will talk about more later.

In the afternoon we had a bbq with Genie's neighbours which is when the bad news came through about the accident which put a bit of a dampener on things.
I hope that they aren't too badly injured and recover quickly.

In the evening we went to a Capoeria/Live Band/Party bash held in a warehouse in the East End which was a new experience for me.
I have to admit I didn't have a fucking clue what was going on for most of it so I did my usual thing of asking loads of questions of all the good looking friendly types there and they all showed great patience with my and my puzzled look.

More......

just visited my upstairs neighbours .... they are both pretty much fine both bruised and sore, as you might imagine, but she's got nothing broken and no internal injuries. he's going to have to live with a wired jaw for several weeks, but is looking on the bright side as he wanted to lose some weight anyway. they are both talking about getting full-face helmets now. i'm very happy to hear this.... also good to know that they're not letting this accident put them off scootering.

dr. pulley sliding rollers installed in the GT today - muchas gracias to the ever-generous doug for giving me the ones that came out of his GTS. So far so good - i love 'em

off to pub quiz at my local

Glad to hear they're not too bashed up, Genie.

Today's drama at Casa de J was a heated one.

Suffice to say the George Foreman has grilled it's last (through no fault of George's I must add) and I have now seen my own kitchen aflame for the first time. With the exception of the grilling machine I am pleased to say there were no casualties and actually no damage to anything. It only cost fifteen quid anyway, so my insurance company need not be flustered.

The Mrs is now recovering (from shock only, thankfully) with a camomile tea and I have once again experienced first-hand the heroic thrill of amateur fire-fighting. 8)

Also I made my last visit today to Glasgow's excellent Museum of Transport, a place which held many memories for me. It closed for the final time tonight to allow all the exhibits to be moved to their eventual new home at the Riverside Museum on the banks of the Rivers Clyde and Kelvin. It was nice to see it one last time, although the spooky Clyde Room was already closed so I had to content myself with peering at that bit through perspex.

As I was parking up I noticed that some jake has had another stab at stealing my scoot, so I've resolved to start using the cover again as another layer of deterrent. Might seriously look into this alarm business...

Today Doug came to collect us at the un-earthly hour of 11am and we rode over to Glenn's place in Bromley to point at his ET4 and diagnose an broken ignition switch as the cause of it's non-starting but " magic fingers Doug" had running within minutes.
Thanks for making us all feel welcome and thanks for the advice for the Tiger Pub as a good place for lunch. Correct it was lovely - and cheap.

After we filled our tummies we had a lovely ride up to Dougs place for some coffee drinking, some change of variator bits for Genie's Interloper and some test rides.
I rode Doug's GTS 250 with it's glorious new pipe which sounds fantastic and I really enjoyed the feel of the Pirelli's.
They really allow you to lean hard into the corners and feel really "sticky" even without much warming up. Strokes chin.
But the real suprise was his Malossi'd ET4 which flew with it's 190 kit but the power comes in a gentle, flat but progressive curve.
I think the kit almost makes it too fast for it's chassis but it's great fun to ride in a "my ET4 never went this far before" kind of way.

Every time I ride the GTS 250 I get this urge to sell the Hornet and go looking for one.

Meh.

Anyway Doug suggested that I harden up my rear suspension because it was on the softest setting and so it was done.
Yes I can vouch that there is less compression in the rear but this has made it even faster in the corners. Not a hint of weave.
Oh deary me Doug what have you done.

Bill XX

This weekend I have mostly been engaging in acts of derring do.

I have been making the Yam 125 scream up and down my street. It wasn't a good love affair but revving a small Yamaha in petty Dulwich makes you feel like such an arse it isn't true. Stall it in front of your neighbours on a pathetically small incline? Yes, rinse and repeat. Fucking thing jumps into neutral when you want second - also in front of the neighbours. Overtaken by Honda Ming? Yes. All bases of humilation covered.

I got the hang of it but hated the gears. This morning being told I was going to do slow speed control on some Suzuki 500 MegaQuick* was therefore terrifying.

And you know what? I found it easy. I spent three hours diddling around cones in first gear with clutch control and it was great. Figure eights laughably simple, along with U turns. It is easier to ride a big bike than a small one. Jesus.

Then I rode all the way back from Orpington to Mayfair to be stabbed in the arm in fencing (this is an improvement as now I am acting defensively). Now I have pink beer and thinking about how to get rid of the Yam asap since I hate it very much. I will probably have more respect for the L platers who ride them in the future but also I will question their sanity.

*not real name but don't care about motorcycles

You see once you twist and go you can't go back.

I'm not sure I'd ride a manual again.

Well done to you for trying Wonder. I salute you.

Bill XX

It's painful Bill.

My question is always - why is this better than my Vespa?

No one has an answer to this except you can go very fast. Which I don't much care about - the 300 is quite fast enough. But if I ever need to go around a set of cones, I'm laughing.

Anyway, if anyone wants a Yam 125 with one careful and one hating owner then you know where to come. I'd set fire to it, but that would be costly.

Nah top speed is the same. When I first rode it, it really did seem the same as before. The ET4 does deliver its power in a strangely linear way, even in standard form. There are two things that make it different. 1) It lifts it front wheel on take off. 2) It didn't seem to be at a huge disadvantage to the GT200s (although it would have been at faster speed, undoubtedly).

Kate, your day sounds fun. It all begs the question though, "Why bother?" Just because, I suppose!

No fears on me turning up in a lumo green leather romper suit with go faster bitch patches and Fazer. That will not happen. If I want terror, I will ask to ride your kitted ET4 for that near death experience.

Put it this way, I learned to ride because I wanted a Vespa. If it had gears, I would have learned those at the time. There was one other machine in my local dealership which I used to stare at when I was tiny that I always wanted to ride along with the Vespa - it is time to do that and that needs gears!

It is British, and is also name of a popular popular bra manufacturer.

ahh the wonder push-up 1100cc .... havnt seen one of them in a while

Wonderbra?

Triumph

Not fast top end Doug but fast in the corners where it caught me out a little bit.

That last corner on the way down your street - I got a bit of a wobble out of it.

Fun though.

Bill XX

So on the way back from Central London I almost got side wiped by some pathetic retard on a GT125.

He looked about 18, was wearing a t-shirt and jeans and was weaving all over the road and generally being very annoying so I did a very mature thing and let him go to the front of the traffic where I hoped he would hopefully kill himself fairly soon.

He annoyed me because he scared me by weaving about 2 ft from the Hornets legshield but I also had Genie on the back and anything that puts her at risk really pisses me off.

Now part of me wanted to ride up along side, reach over, grab hold of the ignition key, pull it out either and ride off with it or toss it into the road while saying something smart like "when you grow up you can have it back" etc etc.

But I did nothing of the sort I just let him ride off and I'm still kicking myself for it.

I'm a gobshite but I hate confrontation and I didn't want to let that little prick spoil my day.

Little Tosser.

Bill XX