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@goshi avatar
UTC

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UTC quote
Okay this is obvisouly not scooter related but anyhow to make a long story short I got in trouble last night when my wife snuck in and caught me midstream in my weealeepeepalee in the shower. Granted I was seven makers marks in but now I gotta buy a new shower curtain liner.

AND I was taking a shower at the same time mind you.

Anyhow this got me thinking...a lot of my male friends have gotten busted peeing drunk in all kinds of places. I had one friend do it in the oven, another on their dresser..even one on his roommate.

Is this normal for guys? Who knows but until I whizz in the fridge, I think my shower snafu is looking pretty good.

Golden showers is one thing but inebriated leakage is at least, pretty funny.

Is it normal for guys to do that, pee on things other than toilets, sinks and tubs?
@nightwing avatar
UTC

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2007 LX 150 (memories)
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UTC quote
Sometimes they pee themselves in the booking room or in the back seat of the Crown Vic on the way to jail.

A peeing drunk can sometimes be a good thing. Timing the elimination of a drunk arrestee can be used as evidence. A guy who asks to go to the john during booking who urinates heavily for 27 seconds did not, as he claims, only have one beer.
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UTC

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UTC quote
I piss in the shower. There's a shit load of piss on the walls and floors surrounding ANY toilet, more than most people can imagine. Having leak in the shower is no big deal

Dave (ex school janitor)
@rudie_cant_fail avatar
UTC

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LX 125
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UTC quote
Guilty!!!!

Ive peed in some pretty strange places when drunk! Most memorably in one of my shoes (it came out of lace holes and woke me up)

My brother in law peed over his mum when she was asleep in bed, that one keeps getting trotted out on family occasions, he wont live that down in a hurry
@judy avatar
UTC

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2007 LX150 Daring Plum Leonardo Da Vespa
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World Traveler
@judy avatar
2007 LX150 Daring Plum Leonardo Da Vespa
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UTC quote
My roommate got hauled off to jail in Waikiki for peeing in the bushes Must of been a slow nite in town. As a female there is nothing worse than being half asleep and hitting a toilet where a guy hasn't put the seat back down YUCK. I have peed in many strange places in my travels since sometimes the bathrooms are gross and a tree looks much more sanitary When we had a bus stop in Bolivia where they didn't have a bathroom i found this out of the way place, squatted doing my thing when a guy walks by and gave me some TP Laughing emoticon In 3rd world countries i wish i had other plumbing most of the time Squatting isn't all that it cracked up to be
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UTC

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Hooked
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UTC quote
All I can say is watch where you do it. A guy I worked with was camping with some friends and after some serious drinking decided to take a piss. Turns out they were in a National campground, probably Mt. Rainier and got caught by the ranger and were ticketed. When the one camper tried to pass the background check for a State of Washington teachers certificate he had some serious explaining to do as to why he had a Federal crime on his record.
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UTC quote
judy wrote:
As a female there is nothing worse than being half asleep and hitting a toilet where a guy hasn't put the seat back down YUCK.
As a male, there's nothing worse than being half-asleep, hitting the toilet, swinging the boys underneath and SITTING ON THEM, because somebody put the lid down.

I have a female friend who tells a story of being at a summer camp when she was a kid. She and a couple of other girls snuck over to spy on the boys' cabin (we're talking about young teenagers) when a few of the guys stepped outside for a leak. The girls didn't want to get caught, so they dove into the bushes, which is exactly where the boys decided to pee. They were so embarrassed that they simply hid there in silence while receiving a warm shower.
@boulty avatar
UTC

Moderator Australis
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@boulty avatar
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UTC quote
Can't see a reason within 'the Guidelines' to lock this thread but WTF is happening to this forum?
Over-share. What The? emoticon
@genie avatar
UTC

Gobshite Shiva
Kymco Downtown 300i the 'Dolphin Noise'
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Gobshite Shiva
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UTC quote
dammit boulty, just as i was about to post my own pee story ....

well not me, but a mate of mine. we were sitting in the front room at a friend's place, when one of his flatmates (who'd been out on the piss earlier, come home very drunk, and gone to bed) staggered into the room, flipped up the cover on one of the decks (turntables) and pee'd all over it. evidently he thought he was in a smaller room and it was the toilet ROFL emoticon we all howled except for the bloke who owned the decks. a replacement was purchased shortly after.
@judy avatar
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World Traveler
2007 LX150 Daring Plum Leonardo Da Vespa
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@judy avatar
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UTC quote
Aw come on BOULTY i'm sure you have your very one cute pee story Eyelashes emoticon
@boulty avatar
UTC

Moderator Australis
2014 Moto Guzzi V7 Stone, 2014 Vespa 150 Primavera (sold) 2003 Vespa GT200 (sold)
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@boulty avatar
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UTC quote
Seven years in the Navy...I have a few believe me.
But generally pee stories just piss me off....
and the really dodgy ones are just a load of sh*t
@scoot_in_va avatar
UTC

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UTC quote
Yep, guys are really stupid when they've had a few beers (I should know as I am guilty on both counts).

I was in the RAF (many years ago) and after an off-duty lunchtime session consisting of quite a few pints, I decided to take a pee off the 1st floor balcony of our barracks. Unfortunately I timed it to coincide with a barrack inspection by the Station Commander. I got 3 days confinement for public intoxication and public urination.

More stupid guys here seeing what happens when you pee on an electric fence.
@ericalm avatar
UTC

Wiki Moderator
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UTC quote
Bringing in a scooter connection... from our recent ride up the coast...
External inline image provided by member with no explanatory text

Big thanks to Genuine Scooter Co. and their mobile privacy screen!
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UTC

Molto Verboso
1967 Gran Turismo 1963 Lambretta S3 TV175 1971 Rally 180
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Molto Verboso
@danyouhandleit avatar
1967 Gran Turismo 1963 Lambretta S3 TV175 1971 Rally 180
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UTC quote
Yeah dude, there is nothing wrong with cutting a wiz in the shower. It isn't the most sanitary place to begin with, you know what I'm sayin'. No doubt we all jerk off in the shower. There isn't much difference. When I lived alone and had to cut a wiz in the middle of the night, I used to just stand next to the tub, turn on the shower for a minute, and let it fly. Ladies, pissing with a hard-on is not the easiest thing to do. Try wedging an early morning boner under the toilet seat without pissing through the crack all over your underwear.

Unrelated, once in my punk band touring days, I pissed in a loaf of bread in the front seat of the van, and then threw it out the window.
@alice avatar
UTC

Molto Verboso
ET4
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Molto Verboso
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UTC quote
This thread had nowhere to go but down ....
@zwerski avatar
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Molto Verboso
"Thread Killer Extraordinaire!"
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Molto Verboso
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UTC quote
Having a beer in the shower... now you're talkin'! That's a favorite of mine.
UTC

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UTC quote
I thought that is where it started and has been bouncing along the bottom until that one, where it hit a bit of a hole. Someone has to say it, urinating in showers, is not on, no matter what time of day or how drunk you are. It is just filthy bad manners, end of story.
@strick avatar
UTC

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UTC quote
One night in college I decided to eat the worm in the tequila. According to my roommate, I peed in my closet not once but twice that night.
Woke up the next morning wondering why my clothes were wet. My roommate and his girlfriend had a blast watching me enter my closet, pee on everything then go right back to bed. Needless to say I have not had a tequila worm since that episode!
UTC

Hooked
2007 GTS 250ie - R.I.P., 2009 GTV 250ie, 2009 Aprilia Mana 850, 2003 Honda Ruckus NPS50
Joined: UTC
Posts: 198
Location: SF Bay Area
 
Hooked
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UTC quote
is it bad to have pissed in the shower while drinking a Guinness?

is it worse that someone took photos?
@nightwing avatar
UTC

Contributor
2007 LX 150 (memories)
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UTC quote
danyouhandleit wrote:
No doubt we all jerk off in the shower. There isn't much difference.
Pee doesn't stick to the hair on your toes.
@oscillator avatar
UTC

Molto Verboso
1974 Rally 200
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Molto Verboso
@oscillator avatar
1974 Rally 200
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UTC quote
Strick wrote:
Needless to say I have not had a tequila worm since that episode!
Musta been mezcal, since there is no worm in tequila.

Unless it is the singing & dancing tequila worm. In that case eat it and you will have better aim, promise.

\\osc
@brett_k avatar
UTC

Hooked
2005 Vespa PX150, 1976 serveta jet 200
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UTC quote
I pissed on rodeo drive late one night. We rolled into LA late one night and there was no trees or bushes anywhere. Also there were these yoofs that would hang in the alley under my window late at night and keep me up so I ... No I didn't piss on em I shook out my rug, you should have heard them a cussin!
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UTC

Molto Verboso
1974 Rally 200
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Molto Verboso
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UTC quote
Wait, Problem Solved:

http://www.traveljohn.com/

Isn't it great living in the technological vastness of today's modern world???

It is the Civilized Solution. Anytime. Anywhere.

And, you can shop on-line for all your urinary needs!

\\osc
OP
@goshi avatar
UTC

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UTC quote
I had a good laugh reading your stories. However on a late Friday night I am sitting alone on the couch watching some Appliance Direct infomercial.

Hey but the bathroom is clean and there's a new shower curtain liner!
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Molto Verboso
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UTC quote
Is that a blues harp or you just happy to read me?
@boulty avatar
UTC

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@boulty avatar
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UTC quote
NightWing wrote:
danyouhandleit wrote:
No doubt we all jerk off in the shower. There isn't much difference.
Pee doesn't stick to the hair on your toes.
eww
Forum member supplied image with no explanatory text
@raisin_hell avatar
UTC

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UTC quote
Best. Thread. Evar.
@znomit avatar
UTC

Veni, Vidi, Posti
LX190 Friday afternoon special, [s]Primavera[/s], S50, too many pushbikes
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Veni, Vidi, Posti
@znomit avatar
LX190 Friday afternoon special, [s]Primavera[/s], S50, too many pushbikes
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UTC quote
I know a girl whose husband used to regularly use the laundry basket. Wha? emoticon Bleh emoticon
@judy avatar
UTC

World Traveler
2007 LX150 Daring Plum Leonardo Da Vespa
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@judy avatar
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UTC quote
Hairy toes GROSS Bleh emoticon
@nightwing avatar
UTC

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UTC quote
judy wrote:
Hairy toes GROSS Bleh emoticon
Only when they have Skippy squeezin's on them. Razz emoticon
@twin01 avatar
UTC

Molto Verboso
2007 Silver GTS250ie
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Molto Verboso
@twin01 avatar
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UTC quote
Great thread.

No Pissing stories from me, but the truckshield post earlier got me thinking.

I did some travel in the US about 6 years ago with some great people. Having been involved in the same hobby here, I was in culture shock to see a port-a-potty being towed around.

Here - it is women to the left, men to the right - and the only bush in sight will not be vegetation!

Also found the colloquial treatment of the need fascinating - "go potty", "go to the bathroom" (why would one go to the bathroom when one needs to use the bog?)

That they towed a dunny was fascinating, but some of the names of providers was even more so - "Honey Bucket" seems big in the Northwest!

Anyway - How many of you have seen Kenny - have a look and a laugh! made "Splashdown" a big name here
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UTC

Hooked
P2, Leather covered '56 Douglas 42l2, vespa/lamby hybrid chop, GTS 250, Lambretta GP, The mighty Bajaj "bad korma"
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UTC quote
re
Reminds me of my class guide for peeing whilst in the bath.

Its a great test of class for englishmen.

upper class people get out of the bath to have a piss.

working class people piss in the bath.

Im middle class as I piss in the sponge then wring it out in the sink.



@danyouhandleit avatar
UTC

Molto Verboso
1967 Gran Turismo 1963 Lambretta S3 TV175 1971 Rally 180
Joined: UTC
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Location: Minneapolis
 
Molto Verboso
@danyouhandleit avatar
1967 Gran Turismo 1963 Lambretta S3 TV175 1971 Rally 180
Joined: UTC
Posts: 1406
Location: Minneapolis
UTC quote
Re: re
glover wrote:
Reminds me of my class guide for peeing whilst in the bath.

Its a great test of class for englishmen.

upper class people get out of the bath to have a piss.

working class people piss in the bath.

Im middle class as I piss in the sponge then wring it out in the sink.



And I suppose you consider yourself American before you get in the shower, Asian when you get out of the shower, and while you're in the shower...European.
@linedog avatar
UTC

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UTC quote
Drunk, and had to go one night so I went in the bushes. There was a homeless guy sleeping in them. He yelled I ran about a block with my winker hang out wetting myself.
@rickeydean avatar
UTC

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GT 200
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UTC quote
NYC on my Birthday, behind a dumpster, ticket from police had to appear in court and plead guilty for urinating in public. Funny thing is most of the guys that were in court on this Monday morning were there for the same offense, all of us dressed in our business suits on the way to work! LOL Clown emoticon Clown emoticon NYC must be making a fortune, maybe they should open some public toilets, but I guess they wouldn't make as much money and have as much fun humiliating us in public! Cost of Fine? $50 USD. Time out of your day? 1 Hour...Humiliation Level? High! Convenience of being able to pay with your Master Card?....Priceless.
@lomunchi avatar
UTC

Veni, Vidi, Posti
2020 Honda NC750DCT
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Location: Maple Grove, MN
 
Veni, Vidi, Posti
@lomunchi avatar
2020 Honda NC750DCT
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UTC quote
In the great white north when your drinking with your buddies (especially in high school) if you can't write your name in the snow when you pee you're a real loser. Longer names aren't as easy as they might seem! You need to drink a lot to get out Lawrence! 'plus there's the whole moving left to right thing while you're inebriated...

In the shower, though, there's a bit of artistry; Strattle the drain, watch the flow of water and make sure you pee what would essentially be down stream to make sure you keep your feet clean.
@rickeydean avatar
UTC

Hooked
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Location: London
 
Hooked
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UTC quote
One day I walked into the bathroom to find my cat squatting over the shower drain, taking a piss! I was impressed with the impeccable aim. Is this a good or a bad thing?
@puffthedragon avatar
UTC

Hooked
GTS 250ie Dragon red
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Location: The other Washington
 
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Posts: 163
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UTC quote
I remember showing a movie way back when I taught middle school kids that was a kind of documentary about bicycle racing somewhere in Europe. I recall seeing the riders urinating while still on their bikes. Can't remember how the exactly were doing this because I was in a panic trying the stop the projector. Maybe some of the cyclists can comment on this. Might it be possible to do this while on a Vespa?
UTC

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Banned
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UTC quote
I have been a little hard on this pissalog thread but as I read more rubish I think there is a silver linning that can come from this after rickeydeans comments on the monday morning in NYC court. The awareness of the lack of public facilities in both small towns and especially large cities. This is something that NZ has addressed in it;s small towns, just about every little town has a sign pointing to a public toilet, some even have coin operated showers. This is a great idea and I think every town should adopt this. This has to be one of the most annoying things having to find a place when you got to go and I am sure this problem will get worse as the baby boomers age.
@jimc avatar
UTC

Moderaptor
The Hornet (GT200, aka Love Bug) and 'Dimples' - a GTS 300
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Posts: 44524
Location: Pleasant Hill, CA
 
Moderaptor
@jimc avatar
The Hornet (GT200, aka Love Bug) and 'Dimples' - a GTS 300
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Posts: 44524
Location: Pleasant Hill, CA
UTC quote
Around here we have a "Community Toilet Scheme":
http://www.richmond.gov.uk/public_conveniences

I had one 'incident' I will never forget. After an 'amount' of beer-drinking in London I went to catch the last train home, and caught it by the skin of my teeth. I was just getting "bladder awareness" at the time, but hey, the journey was only 35 minutes.

However by halfway home I was in severe "I've gotta go" mode, and by the time the train arrived at my stop I was in flaming agony. How I held it in that far I do not know. Lots of 'external clamping' helped, but looked to others like I had a severe case of crabs...

I leapt out of the train at my destination, and just peed against the railings at the side of the platform. This pee must have lasted about 40 seconds - it seemed like hours, and was such a relief.

Then I noticed the platform had a gentle slope back to the track, and my pee hadn't gone outside the station into the usual weed-patch but was a roaring torrent across the platform. People had to jump over it on their way past.

Many gave me funny looks. Once my brain was feeling normal again I looked up and understood why. Two feet away was the door to the Gents...
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