Modern Vespa

This is a poem I wrote some years ago.

Please put shoes
upon your feet

I'm here for dinner
and trying to eat

I have no interest
in your ugly toes

I've never seen worse
than the sight of those

Scaly ankles and
two crusty heels

Make me puke up
my last three meals

Busted nails with
bright red polish

Feet like yours
they should abolish

Nature has made
a big mistake

We should have flippers
to swim in the lake

No more feet and
no more toes

No more heels
no barefoot shows

No more corns
or calluses too

From jamming the foot
in too small a shoe

So flippers we need
to stop the whole trend

Of showing the feet
which often offend

Which is exactly why my flip flops (and my feet) get doused in water with (mild) clorox every single day.

I have a floor sink with drain that gets filled up with fresh water, clorox added and I step into it and wash my feet and flip flops before going into the house. The shoes get left outdors and I wipe off my feet with a microfiber towel. I hate germs and I hate dirty floors even moreso!

Heels may be cracked
and toes may be corny
But I have a foot fetish
SO FEET MAKE ME HORNY!!!!

Wearing shower shoes in public is one of many gauche things in society that show disrespect for the wearer and others. I wish establishments would consider them as "no shoes" and not allow entry. Fercrissake you even see them in church, along with halter tops, short shorts and filthy rag-bottom pants. No respect.

Hair too?

Eeh... ya feeky chucker!