Modern Vespa

how about we change this thread to:

PLEASE STOP WITH THE HORRIBLE, UNORIGINAL, UNFUNNY TIGER WOODS GOLF PUNS

PLEASE.

So the guy needs a mulligan on his marriage. Big Deal...

Let's not handicap the poor guys experienc.

These days a successful marriage isn't par for the course.

Compiled so folks like me don't have to read the rest

Doesn't say I dont read threads on a scooter site, it says I'm not interested and dont read news articles or watch it on TV.

im in love

You beat me to the punch!

Did you hear that Nike's standing by Tiger throughout all this? There motto is of course "Just Do It"...........(jay Leno joke)!

What were Tiger Woods and his wife doing at 2:30 in the morning? They went Clubbing!

Tiger crashed into a Fire Hydrant and a Tree, he could decide between a wood or an iron.

For the first time, Tiger failed to drive 300 yards.

Apparently, the only person who can beat Tiger Woods with a golf club is his wife.

Brian,
Will the rum I just spit all over my keyboard hurt it?

* It has just been reported that Phil Mickelson contacted Tiger's
wife, Elin, to pick up some tips on how to beat Tiger.......



* The police asked Elin how many times she hit him. She replied, "I don't know exactly, but put me down for a 5 "



* Tiger Woods is so rich that he owns lots of expensive cars. Now he has a hole in one.......

To me, scootering and golf are definitely related.

After my first scooter ride 9 years ago, I never picked up my golf clubs again, not even once.

I'm laughing at the jokes, but sad about this, because I always like to see the underdog make good. Any minority on the golf course is still the social underdog, no matter how he drives and putts.

I still like Tiger, we are all human

So do we all get a free pass? Ha, don't think so.

Miss ya buddy.

SDG

We should be more supportive of Tiger; after all, he is a Vespa owner:

Proof: http://marinefuel.com/tiger-woods-yacht/

But as long as we are:

What is the difference between a Ford Escalade and a golfball"
- - Tiger can drive a golfball more than 400 yards

When the police asked how many times she hit Tiger, she replied, "Six but I wrote down five strokes on the card."

What does Tiger Woods have in common with baby seals?
They both got clubbed by Scandinavians.

Tiger and Elin have signed a new prenuptual agreement. According to the new contract, the next time Tiger plays a round, Elin will hand him his balls.

Ok the first one was a little low...but I go there sometimes. And PETA peeps...it was just a joke.

Oh and sorry Tiger. Still love ya man but you really effed up.

what a stupid f##k

Some sage advice to all those who post rumours about people. Please read right to the end.



Keep this philosophy in mind the next time you hear, or are about to repeat a rumor.

In ancient Greece (469 - 399 BC), Socrates was widely lauded for his wisdom. One day the great philosopher came upon an acquaintance, who ran up to him excitedly and said, "Socrates, do you know what I just heard about one of your students...?"

"Wait a moment," Socrates replied. "Before you tell me, I'd like you to pass a little test. It's called the Test of Three."

"Test of Three?"

"That's correct," Socrates continued.

"Before you talk to me about my student let's take a moment to test what you're going to say. The first test is Truth. Have you made absolutely sure that what you are about to tell me is true?"

"No," the man replied, "actually I just heard about it."

"All right," said Socrates. "So you don't really know if it's true or not. Now let's try the second test, the test of Goodness. Is what you are about to tell me about my student something good?"

"No, on the contrary..."

"So," Socrates continued, "you want to tell me
something bad about him even though you're not certain it's true?"

The man shrugged, a little embarrassed.
Socrates continued, "You may still pass though because there is a third test - the filter of Usefulness. Is what you want to tell me about my student going to be useful to me?"

"No, not really..."

"Well," concluded Socrates, "if what you want to tell me is neither True nor Good nor even Useful, why tell it to me at all?"

The man was defeated and ashamed and said no more.

This is the reason Socrates was a great philosopher and held in such high esteem.

It also explains why Socrates never found out that Plato was banging his wife


Dave

Or that they were soon going to give him some hemlock to drink.

Har har!

Miss Overstock reminds me of Mrs. Palin.

Where can I get a "I'm better in bed than Tiger Woods" T- Shirt ?

Bill X

'Flo' is currently the only woman in the world who possibly could lead me astray......

What really happened:

This must be true, it was on the Internet!

I feel very sorry for Elin and thier kids. They deserved far better than the self-admitted slimeball Mr. Woods.

That said....

Head to head Sabine's got it all over Elin. Ms. Ehrenfeld speaks 6 languages, is an outstanding athlete, has pilot's license, is exceedingly intelligent and is wealthy in her own right. I don't think she's ever taken a pitching wedge to her husband's head/car/etc/. Plus she's nearly 50 and looks that good.

My gawd she is beautiful!!!!


THIS is what really happened...
That is too freaking funny...

Cripes, the score is 10 and growing.
When did this guy ever have time to play golf??

He's got a long way to go to catch up to Magic Johnson though, who claimed 10,000 or more.
I always wondered how he ever managed to play basketball.

Must be all those steroids.

Hell, I have a "hard" time doing it once a day.
Better get me some Viagra.

bet by the end of the week we hear a claim of a Tiger love child.

I bet the there has been a drop in golf ball sales for christmas!!!!

Isn't that what got him into trouble?

I am that love child. Leave my dad alone.