Modern Vespa

I went up to see my parents this evening.

Dad had been at a bit of a long lunch and had an old friend and a new friend over enjoying a few additional bevvies.

Long story short, I needed one of them to move his 4WD out o fthe driveway so the Vespa could be safe while mum and I went out (they live on a busy road, quite close to a roundabout, so too easy for scooter left on road to get cleaned up).

After some jiggery pokery where drunken lord tells me I can just pop the scooter past the side of the 4WD he is not fussed about scratching because it is a company car...he jumps onto my Vespa!!!!!!!!

I. WENT. MENTAL.

And now have some nice new family conflict because I was behaving like a baby.

Yes, I got angry. And I pointed out it was a $9000 scooter, not a bloody toy.

I just think it is incredibly bad form to get on someone's bike without asking. You just don't do that!!!

But I didn't deck him or anything.

Was I out of line?

You were certainly not out of line in my opinion. I agree that one doesn't just jump onto someone else's scooter without asking. Would you jump into the driver's seat of his truck/car without asking? Do you think he'd think you're presumptuous if you just jumped into his vehicle without asking first? I'd say he'd be upset. I'm watching your back on this one.

I second that.

The lack of respect is aimed not just at you but your choice of wheels, to me that is part of the story, perhaps unsaid by them or by you. So you went "mental" not just because they were being rude to you, but to your ability to make your own choices, and i think your anger was entirely justified.
The problem isn't the anger, its the expression of it with the consequences. Speaking as someone who doesn't much care for his family I say good for you. Someone who hopes to have a future relationship with those family members may have a problem.
They see you as a baby. I see you as a strong willed independant woman. How ready are you to eat large slices of humble pi e?
Good luck with that.

Lets see....drunk might have something to do with it. While you were most definately not out of line, the drunken lord needs a reality check. Its your family and they will cool off eventually.

Interesting analysis, Conchie. I left out the bit where he had made a disparaging comment about scooter riders buzzing him earlier that day and "aiming" for him - a highly unlikely scenario, to which I responded that it's far more likely to be the other way around.

Hopefully dad will wake up tomorrow and not remember I spoiled his good time.

They were being d!ckheads, but.

no. not out of line at all. i'd lose it too, especially since he'd been drinking!

Elaborate on "jumped on"

If he just sat on the seat, he is your Dad, I wouldn't have gone mad. If he jumped at it with a speed, putting it at risk, then perhaps you should've decked him.

Just a quick question, what is your gender and age??

Having been in OZ for some time, several years back, with my daughter and son in law, I got a feel for the way things were done there.

I got the feel that that the "Boss" was the boss, Fosters or not!

I hope my generalising (generalizing) doesn't start a war on this thread.

It wsn't dad who jumped on the scoot. It was some bloke who was a friend of a friend of his.

I am partly touchy because I dropped her for the first time a few weeks ago and she just came back from the paint shop on Thursday. Adding some new chrome and upholstery improvement, I've spent a grand on her this week. And some dude who drives a company car that he has just said he doesn't care about because if it gets wrecked the company pays just starts jumping up on to her liek she's a dinky toy - steam starts coming out of my ears.

(Actually - this gets back to my dad's attitude towards the Vespa. He drove company cars all his life and doesn't have any kind of passion or interest in cars. You can see people who appreciate a marque with tradition, who have an eye for good styling and so on...they "get" the Vespa. Mein papa, on the other hand..)

Female, 40. But always about three years old in mum and dads' eyes.

Dad is not really a blokey bloke. He's actually pretty passive. But he's been passive aggressive about his "little girl" getting on two wheels.

Elaborate on "I. WENT. MENTAL."

I mean there is standing your ground, getting mad, throwing a tantrum and then there is totally wigging out.

The further along that continuum you go, the more you seem like a child to them (especially since drinks are involved).
The more you seem like a child, the more they'll see and treat your scooter as a toy.

Not to say they are justified, but I'm sure that is how they saw it.

Oh I just got my back up and told him to get off immediately, that it was an expensive scooter and not a dinky toy. There was no tantrum, just impatience at having to try and calm down a drunk old fool who was not repecting my stuff.

But, despite my age now, in my parent's eyes, this was still, "Talking up to your elders"

If anything I feel guilty because it bought dad's day to an end. Apparently getting in the SUV and backing it out onto the street and then walking back inside was too much effort, so they left.

My response would have been..."it's my house...."

And if the scooter got damaged, then hopefully also your insurance policy?

I would totally do a Jimmy and run over all of your mum's flowers. Then take off in a heated rage and meet your friends and buy some pills.

FELL OF CHAIR ON THAT ONE.......

Ha ha! How did I know Lucky Bastard would come up with some great advice.

Unfortunately, in line with my parents' highly organised and structured home-making, running over flowers involves mounting a foot high cement and slate structure (which is kind of what I was worried about in the first place)

I'm off to spend the day hanging out with crazy Italians at some big multicultural picnic. My turn to be the drunk, crazy fool!

Grab the drunk dudes SUV and see if it can handle the cement wall.

Scooters are like Yachats and Sailboats, one waits until the owner asks you to come'aboard...

8) 8)

I think I would have punched him right on his hooter, people should have more respect for others property regardless of who they are. BTW i hate the fact that even though i'm 36 my perents still treat me like a 14 year old WTF is that all about.

Dont feel bad about it Scooterific, I bet the guy who did it feels like an arsehole (if he can remember what happened that is )

ah don't let anyone ride on your $9,000 vespa! it's smart way just only you drive it. I felt same way you did when someone jumped on my scooter, it was rude.

Actually I think you won that one and here's why.

You stood up to the guy, told him what your "toy" cost and instead of saying much else to you they decided to leave. If there's anything I think it taught your dad and mum its that you're to be taken seriously from now on. I think you ought to hold to your position that you had when you told the jerk to get off what isn't his property. If your parents give you any grief over it calmly and firmly Do Not Back Down. Tell dad his friends act like a arses and you proved it because they chose to leave over admitting they were a couple of arses and in the wrong. Not to mention that although you love your dad, his priorities are out of whack because he took the side of someone not even related to him over his own blood.

You won that round. But its only one round of a match. Your dad might try to wear you down or pile guilt on you but you don't have to own it. You did the right thing.

What you need to do now is if he or mom bring it up again and they try to turn it into an argument (or a way to cut you down/put you in your place), politely say you're not changing your position and excuse yourself from their residence. The only way you're going to get their respect is by acting more adult then they are. They're not going to like it and its going to take a loooong time if it ever does change but its what you have to stand on.

Good luck

The Roadbum